Sweet Valley High Senior Year #6: Your Basic Nightmare

The Big Deal: Football game

Synopsis:

Jessica wakes up totally depressed on Saturday morning because Jeremy never came after her when she ran out of the party last night. Meanwhile, poor Jeremy is at the hospital. His father is awake, but he still looks like crap. There’s a football game that afternoon and Jeremy’s dad is for some reason adamant that Jeremy get out of the hospital and play in the game. Jeremy has no intention of playing that afternoon, but he tells his dad he will.

Liz calls Maria and asks her to go to brunch. Maria picks her up and says she wants to ask Liz something about Conner. Liz is sure Maria found out about the kiss, but Maria just says she saw Liz’s crappy love poem about him. Liz makes something up and somehow gets Maria to believe the poem wasn’t about Conner and that she still doesn’t like him. When Maria drops her off, Liz tries to tell Conner they should stay away from each other because she doesn’t want to hurt Maria. Then they make out a little.

When Melissa wakes up and goes downstairs on Saturday, Will is sitting in her kitchen. She assumes he’s there to apologize for leaving her at the party, but he instead tells her he’s breaking up with her. Will leaves, and Melissa puts on her cheerleading uniform and gets ready for the game. By the time she gets to the school, she’s convinced herself that everyone is going to know she was dumped and they’ll all be laughing at her. During the game, it becomes clear that nobody knows. She finds Will after the game and says she assumes he didn’t tell anyone because he’s having second thoughts. Will says sorry, but no. He just wanted her to be able to tell her friends in her own time. Melissa is appalled. She makes Will promise not to tell anyone until she’s told her friends.

Liz goes to Riot with Tia, Andy, Angel and Maria, and she gets all freaked out when Conner shows up and sits down next to her. When he asks her to dance, she says she needs something to drink. She goes to the bar and Maria goes with her, ranting the whole time about how Conner is such a jerk to ask Liz to dance when he knows she doesn’t like him. While Maria is at the bar with her back turned, Conner comes up to Liz and takes her upstairs to the makeout room. After they kiss for a while, Liz says they need to go back downstairs because Maria, Maria, Maria. Conner gets annoyed and storms off.

Melissa goes to a victory party and tries to avoid Will most of the night. Suddenly, her stupid friend Cherie comes up to her, dragging Will along behind her. Cherie says she’s noticed Will and Melissa haven’t spoken all night and she wants them to make up and dance. Melissa asks Will to dance with her just once to keep up appearances, and in his protests he makes it clear he’s been planning to break up with Melissa for a while. She starts shouting and making a scene, so now everyone knows Will dumped her. She leaves the party, humiliated.

Jeremy and his mother go home to get a few hours of sleep, and then they have dinner together. Mrs. Aames mentions that Jeremy’s father needs to get a job because she thinks the not working and not providing is what stressed him out and made him sick. Jeremy freaks out because he thinks everyone should be taking care of his father and not trying to force him to work. He’s incredibly childish as he runs out the door and drives to the hospital to spend the night in a chair in his father’s room.

At two in the morning, Conner goes to Tia’s house and taps on her window to tell her he’s been messing around with Elizabeth and to ask her advice about it. Tia tells him to let Liz handle the Maria situation in her own way. At the same time, Liz goes to Fowler Crest and wakes up Jessica to do the same thing. Jessica tells her to tell Maria what’s going on.

When Jessica goes to work on Sunday morning and finds out Jeremy called in sick, she gets all upset because she thinks he’s just avoiding her. Wow, such ego. When she gets off work, Jessica finds Jeremy’s address and drives out to his house. He opens the door and she yells at him. When she’s finished, Jeremy takes her inside and shows her his big empty house from which most of the furniture has been sold and tells her everything that’s been going on with his family. Then they make out a little bit. After that, Jessica’s confidence makes a stunning comeback and she decides to go to Melissa’s and tell her off. But when she gets there, Will comes running out of the house looking distressed. He says Jessica can’t talk to Melissa because she’s at the hospital. She’s tried to commit suicide. Again. Apparently, the big mysterious thing in Melissa’s past that has been alluded to this whole time is that she tried to overdose back in eighth grade.

Maria insists on coming over to Liz’s because she’s decided not to let Conner’s presence keep her from hanging out with her best friend. Naturally, she gets there just in time to see Conner and Liz kissing in the kitchen.

The Cover: I hate Melissa’s face. She looks like such a bitch.

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Comments
  • Emma February 26, 2010 at 12:49 pm

    Where’s all the snark? I miss it from the last series you did 🙁

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    😕 I thought I was still being pretty snarky. If not, I guess it’s because these books aren’t nearly as ridiculous and over the top as the original series and they’re a little bit harder to make fun of.

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    On second thought, you’re right. I’m going to try to kick up the snark on future posts. I think the dullness of these books made me lose the funny for a minute.

    [Reply]

  • Dee February 26, 2010 at 2:49 pm

    You know what I miss? The ‘moral of the story.’ 🙂 Those always made me laugh. I still always enjoy reading your recaps, especially your take on the covers.

    But I do agree with you 100 percent…this series is harder to make fun of. It needs something…maybe a tornado or a couple of poltergeists that fall in love Elizabeth and have a supernatural fight over her.

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    I tried, I really did, but these books are so much less episodic than the other books. They blend into one another and there isn’t such a clearly defined theme or story line that can be turned into a moral. I promise that particular section will be back when I get to University.

    I never thought I’d say it, but I really wish something ridiculous would happen to liven these books up. I love the idea of poltergeists falling in love with Liz. Now that would be snarkable.

    [Reply]

    Christine Reply:

    Awww, don’t worry Shannon…boring-bad is much tougher to mock than outrageously-bad. Still love your recaps. Spares me reading the books… now I know I don’t have to waste money on ebay “completing my collection” and satisfying my curiosity. 😛 You’re doing a great public service!

    I know how you feel…I thought I hated how ridiculous Sweet Valley got, with the vampires and psycho serial killers… I *thought* I wanted more realism. I thought wrong.

    Although, I hope it’s not common in real life, being suicidal over a high-school break-up…but that’s not the “fun” kind of not-realistic. 🙁 I guess the problem is that Senior Year is more…serious & melodramatic. It was odd seeing characters *not* traumatized by kidnappers/killers in the old books. But I don’t want to watch them agonizing and suffering either! I’m impossible to please. 🙂 (Francine and Diablo are taking notes, I’m sure) 😉

    [Reply]

  • Anonymous February 26, 2010 at 4:51 pm

    Bring back the favorite quotes section! I loved when you did 3 or 4 per book and then commented on them. I’m sure there’s a bunch of hilarious material about the internet and other new inventions. A;sp. having to tap on a bedroom window instead of just calling someone’s cell? These are older than I thought!

    [Reply]

    Anonymous Reply:

    Oops I meant “also.” Furthermore, even pre-cell phone, I wasn’t dropping by people’s houses unannounced just to A) hang out without knowing if they were free, or B) tell them off. These kids are way too stalker-ish, or else they’re all supposed to live in the same neighborhood.

    [Reply]

  • Janelle February 26, 2010 at 6:52 pm

    I’ve also noticed there’s a lot more (real-life) cultural references in this series- and I love it cause it’s all stuff from when I was in jr. high/high school!

    [Reply]

  • Jane February 26, 2010 at 8:10 pm

    Again, I hate Maria. She dated Connor for five seconds, and she acts like he broke off their engagement.

    How to deal with a problem in SV Senior Year: Run away.

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    ME TOO! Ugh, she is so irritating!

    [Reply]

    Christine Reply:

    One change I *wish* they’d make in this new series: stop having kids “fall in love” so damn fast! It’s always LOVE. Maybe it’s a crush the first day they meet..then it’s LOVE. If the writers acknowledged that sometimes the characters call it love ’cause they’re over-dramatic adolescents, when actually it’s just hormones… that’d be nice. Or in Maria’s case, insecurity and loneliness. Preferably without ContemptuousConner (and the writers) putting her down as a clingy jealous loser. Let’s explore Maria’s pysche…the root of her desperate need for male attention/fear of being boyfriend-less. That’ll make for great reading! (Or just add vampires)

    I’m glad Jessica’s confidence is restored …by a boy showing interest in her, of course. Sweet Valley is consistent in all the wrong ways. 😛

    [Reply]

  • Sadako March 1, 2010 at 1:03 am

    I hate her bitchy face, too.

    And I agree, Christine–I hate this, “We met! We’re in love!” stuff in so many ya books/sitcoms.

    [Reply]

  • Sandy March 1, 2010 at 11:29 am

    I like how Conner is already in Melissa’s house to break up with her. And how he taps on Tia’s window. The dude has a free pass to everyone’s house!

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    I think you’re confusing Conner and Will. I do find it odd that Will is just hanging out at Melissa’s when she wakes up. I’m not sure my mom would have just let my boyfriend sit around watching television in the living room if I was still asleep.

    [Reply]

    Sandy Reply:

    Yes, I am confusing them. lol Sorry.

    [Reply]

  • thea March 20, 2010 at 12:06 am

    i think the cover model is gorgeous. the character is a bitch tho and she looks exactly as described in the book. will is fugly.

    [Reply]

  • Flo November 27, 2010 at 12:57 am

    Will is fugs. I can’t believe Melissa fought so hard for this dollar store Matt Damon.

    [Reply]

  • Aly January 7, 2014 at 8:28 am

    Isn’t the girl on the cover the actress who plays Rory on Gilmore Girls?
    I love reading this and have told my sister to check it out. Have you done anything on the University books? I never got to read them all and wondered what happened to Jessica’s first husband Mike the hunky mechanic?

    [Reply]

  • Shannon January 8, 2014 at 2:17 pm

    No, that is definitely not Alexis Bledel. I haven’t done anything with University yet. I was going to do them next, but decided on SVT instead.

    [Reply]

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