Sweet Valley High #112: Jessica Quits the Squad

SVH112The Moral of the Story: Anyone prettier than a Wakefield must be evil.

The Big Deal: Beach barbecue, party at Amy’s, party at Lila’s

Synopsis:

After yet another win for the Sweet Valley High football team, the whole gang gathers at the Dairi Burger, where everyone congratulates Jessica and the other cheerleaders on what a great job they did leading the team to victory. Everyone gets quiet when a really pretty girl walks in, orders some food and leaves. As soon as she’s gone, everyone starts talking about how beautiful she was. Jessica hates the girl instantly and hopes she never sees her again. Later, at a celebratory party on the beach, Ken and Jessica start making out. Liz sees them and does not approve. She’s all jealous and wonders if she still has feelings for Ken.

When Jessica gets to school on Monday, she finds out the pretty girl from the Dairi Burger is a new student. Her name is Heather Mallone and everyone besides Jessica is immediately in love with her. When Heather says she wants to be on the cheerleading squad, Jessica decides to come up with a bunch of tests she’ll have to pass. On Tuesday, Heather has to sit with the chess club geeks at lunch (they help her with her homework and become friends with her). On Wednesday, she has to wear overalls and a cowboy hat to school (everyone tells her how great it is that she wears what she wants and that she can really pull off “that grunge look that’s so in style these days”). On Thursday, she has to sing the national anthem in homeroom (she has a beautiful voice and everyone wants to hear her sing more songs). After all that, the squad puts it to a vote and Jessica tries really hard to convince everyone Heather shouldn’t be on the squad. Nobody listens to her.

Liz is still freaking out about the Ken situation. She goes to Mr. Collins for advice, using the old “my friend has a problem” bit. Mr. Collins says Liz’s “friend” needs to resolve her feelings for the guy, but Liz just isn’t sure how to do that. She goes to the beach and finds Robin there. Robin is upset because her father got a job transfer to Denver and the Wilsons have to move. When the rest of the squad finds out, they take a vote and make Heather the new co-captain while Jessica sits there sputtering in protest.

Liz can’t get over this whole thing with Ken, so she tries to make Jessica paranoid about him, implying that he might not like her as much as she thinks. Jessica dismisses everything Liz says. Amy throws a going away party for Robin, and Heather shows up and starts flirting with Ken. Jessica “accidentally” knocks Heather into the pool. Liz watches Ken and Jessica dance and gets jealous. God, she’s obnoxious.

Jessica comes down with a fever and has to miss a cheerleading practice. Maria calls that night crying because Heather kicked her and Sandy off the squad. Jessica is sure the other girls won’t stand for this, but Heather has them brainwashed into thinking she can take them to nationals if they’ll just do everything she says. Heather introduces a new diet and exercise regime. She says the girls have to jog three miles every day, lift weights for an hour every day and cut all fat out of their diets. Anyone caught eating fat will be kicked off the squad. Jessica can’t believe the rest of the squad goes along with this.

Liz sits at home Friday night looking through her secret cigar box full of treasures. In this box is a framed picture of Liz and Ken kissing in a photo booth. Liz is mooning over it and being all sad when Jessica comes home. She tries to tell Liz all about her awesome date with Ken, but Liz freaks out and leaves the room. Confused, Jessica lies back on Liz’s bed and finds the picture under the pillow.

The next day is a big football game, and Jessica is horrified when the cheerleaders start doing a cheer she’s never seen before. She yells at Heather and tells everyone she quits. Ken drags her out for ice cream later and tries to get her to go to the party Lila’s having, but Jessica is upset about the squad and about Ken kissing Liz, so she asks him to take her home. While Liz is at the party, Jessica snoops around until she finds Liz’s diary. She reads all about Ken and gets all upset that Ken and Liz had “an affair.”

Quotes:

“She’s certainly creating a big stir,” Helen Bradley said…

I thought Helen Bradley moved to L.A. a long, long time ago. Didn’t Amy Sutton move into Helen’s old house?

“As you know, I’m not crazy about Jessica…”

This is the second or third time Todd has said something like this. Methinks he doth protest too much.

“As you know, I don’t usually pay much attention to cheerleading, but I did notice that the crowds were more enthusiastic than usual at yesterday’s game.”

Shut up, Liz. Something about this quote just irks the hell out of me.

The Cover: I really kind of love Heather for putting her pom in front of Jessica’s face.

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Comments
  • Children of the 90s October 12, 2009 at 12:13 pm

    This cover is truly awesome. Also, you are incredible at picking up continuity errors, I am very impressed. SVH is full of them, but growing up I just assumed that these inexplicable changes happened behind the scenes in the parts of the twins’ lives not documented by the exhaustive series.

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    Thank you! I’m sure there are plenty that I don’t pick up on because man, there sure are a lot of ’em. I just remembered Helen Bradley because of how stupid it was when she moved away and Jessica was all upset that they couldn’t use her rocking chair to practice for the rocking chair relay thing. Ha.

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  • girltalkread October 12, 2009 at 12:29 pm

    Ummmm- when does Robin Wilson have a dad in the house?????? And I do remember that Helen and her family moved- when does Helen return???? WOW- sooo many effin inconsistencies! I know I wasn’t reading SVH when this crap came out, but it sounds sooo crappy it may be awesome!! My sister may have read these books ( I know she read about that vampire in love w/ Jess and that whole Christian Gorman thing) so I have to ask her what she thought of this mess.

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    Robin having a dad is one thing I wasn’t sure of. I don’t remember him being around, but I can’t remember if we were specifically told he was out of the picture. I’ll have to go back and reread Power Play one of these days.

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  • Merrie October 12, 2009 at 2:48 pm

    For some reason I thought Robin’s dad was out of the pircture, too. I thought that was why her rich aunt had all the power — Mrs. Wilson had no man and no money.

    OK, so the football team wins and everyone congraulates the cheerleaders? Really?

    Yea for Jessica stealing Todd’s “into the pool” move!

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    Yep, ’cause everyone knows it’s really the cheerleaders who do all the work.

    [Reply]

  • Sadako October 12, 2009 at 2:59 pm

    If Todd goes out of his way to hate on Jessica but he’s clearly attracted to the way she looks (well, he’s attracted to Liz), maybe he wants a twin threeway!

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    You know he does. Or he would if he knew such a thing existed.

    [Reply]

  • Fear Street October 12, 2009 at 3:56 pm

    I love when people stick it to Jessica.

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    Me too! It doesn’t happen nearly enough.

    [Reply]

  • Lindsay October 12, 2009 at 4:24 pm

    Liz, don’t you have a boyfriend? Yeah? Well, shut the fuck up.

    [Reply]

    Lori Reply:

    Well it has been a month or two since she last cheated on him its probably time to do it again. If the romance with Ken was so hot why did she break up with him?

    [Reply]

    Lindsay Reply:

    Ha!

    “If the romance with Ken was so hot why did she break up with him?”

    Nothing truer has ever been said

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    Seriously.

    It really is amazing that she can’t go more than a couple books without cheating on her super hunky boyfriend.

    [Reply]

  • Lori October 12, 2009 at 7:58 pm

    Anyone who sticks it to Jessica immediately becomes a favorite of mine. I loved how every trick Jessica played made Heather even more popular.

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    Me too. I can’t believe I got through this whole recap without a single Regina George reference.

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  • Lorelai October 12, 2009 at 11:05 pm

    This is a great (read: stupid) miniseries. The last book is pure, unadulterated lunacy…I can’t wait.
    Oh, and cut Todd some slack — I think he might not be over that whole Jessica-accused-him-of-date-rape-at-the-start-of-the-year thing. I don’t much like Todd, but he’s the only character I can think of who doesn’t spontaneously forget everything that’s happened at the start of the series. If he’d seen Helen Bradley, he’d have been like, “wft, bitch? I thought you moved.”

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    LOL, I would love it if Todd would have said that to Helen.

    [Reply]

  • Darren October 13, 2009 at 1:04 am

    That’s nothing, if you read Sweet Valley University, I forgot the book number, Olivia Davidson resurrected from the dead in SVU, where she supposedly died during the Earthquake! Helen Bradley…if you look at 113 and 114, she’s not mentioned again! So who’s the 12th cheerleader then! How did Helen move back to Sweet valley?

    This 3 part epic is like a Bring it On movie. 114 is great when Todd/Ken have a knock down, drag out, fight, but it really involved Bruce Patman. surprised they didn’t mention Bruce’s girlfriend Pamela.

    I don’t like Heather that much, too stuck up. Needs a kick in the ass if you know what I mean.

    [Reply]

  • Darren October 13, 2009 at 1:06 am

    Heather reminds me of that character from Melrose Place, not Amanda, but that other girl. Forgot her name! I think she later plays Jim Belushi’s wife though, name escapes me though!

    [Reply]

    Lorelai Reply:

    Allison? Courtney Thorne Smith played her? I’m pretty sure that’s who you were thinking of. Heather reminds me of every female character in Melrose Place, because they were all so bitchy. That’s why I prefer 90210 🙂

    [Reply]

    Darren Reply:

    Yeah, that’s what I meant to say, she did look like Courtney Thorne Smith if you look at Heather the way she arcs her arm. I bet the dark haried girl behind her was Jean West, what a looker she turned out to be over 80 chapters later! How appropriate Annie and Amy were hidden from sight opposite Jessica!

    [Reply]

  • Sandy October 13, 2009 at 10:48 am

    Ah, I was off yesterday. The kiddos had a holiday so I chilled at home and stuffed my face with food all day.

    As for the recap, I don’t like Heather. For some reason I feel like I’ve been in Jessica’s shoes before. I don’t like awesome people like Heather. Clearly she is a coke head. It’s just so obvious, how else can see be good at everything and then do weights and crap like that.

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    I think she’s taking caffeine pills. It’s the only way she can do everything she does and be so good at it all. I bet she sings in a girl band, too.

    I’m torn between hating Heather for being so awesome and loving her for putting Jessica in her place.

    [Reply]

    Merrie Reply:

    Caffeine pills? Like Jessie Spano from Saved By The Bell?

    “I’m so excited! I’m so excited! Im so — scared!” (Please tell me I’m not the only one who loves that.)

    [Reply]

    Sandy Reply:

    Yes! I remember that! Maybe that’s why I don’t like Heather? I was also thinking of Liv Tyler’s character on Empire Records. But then Jess would be Renee Zelweiner (can’t sp her name). Although Renee’s character was sort of a slut….

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    That’s what I’m talking about!

    [Reply]

    Sandy Reply:

    Ohhh! Shannon! I get IT! The all girl band reference. I was thinking Gee that came out of nowhere!

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    LOL, I was being subtle…a little too subtle.

    I just tweaked the site to allow more reply levels in the comments. It was only allowing one main comment and two replies before.

    [Reply]

  • Katie October 13, 2009 at 2:35 pm

    Hot Sundae forever! Totally got the girl band reference!
    Best. Fake. Video. Ever.

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    Seriously. How sad is it that I STILL remember the words to the song?

    Here’s a message that I’m sending to you…

    [Reply]

    Katie Reply:

    Me too!

    “Put your mind to it, go for it, get down and break a sweat, rock and roll, you ain’t seen nothing yet!”

    [Reply]

  • Margo Rising October 13, 2009 at 3:50 pm

    “This is the second or third time Todd has said something like this. Methinks he doth protest too much.”

    According to one of Jessica’s damn secret diaries, he does! He does protest too much!

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    Oh, those damned diaries, lol. I hate them!

    [Reply]

    Darren Reply:

    Too bad it wasn’t some Wonder Years episode, where KEvin and Winnie both fooled around with other people! It’s amazing what Liz and Todd have gone through, and so hard to believe she had time for a fling with Ken! How did that happen?

    [Reply]

  • jasmine June 25, 2010 at 1:21 am

    was the sandy that got kicked off the squad the same racist ho-bag douchey wench bitch sandy bacon? damn i hated that trick. i had always hoped she’d get killed or something.

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    The one and only. I hate her, too. Like, a lot.

    [Reply]

  • Marian October 16, 2011 at 9:30 am

    I never read past book 50 or so, but wow! I never thought that Jessica and Elizabeth would be so passive aggresively mean to each other. All this boyfriend stealing and plotting against each other is so weird. I never thought the Wakefield twins would come to this.

    [Reply]

  • Nikki August 11, 2012 at 12:37 am

    i remember reading this book and instantly hating Heather, she’s evil!

    [Reply]

  • Kylie90210 May 7, 2013 at 8:41 pm

    Ohh my favourite mini-series! Ken was my favourite bf for Jess in SVH, and I loved hating Heather. I also love Liz and Lila as cheerleaders later on! Yayyyyy!

    [Reply]

  • Krista November 2, 2013 at 6:25 pm

    I am kind of sad we lost Robin Wilson. I know they hadn’t done much with her in a long time, but I always liked her.

    [Reply]

  • a June 20, 2014 at 4:53 pm

    Hey there! I’ve been following your blog for a long time now and finally got the courage to go ahead and give
    you a shout out from Porter Texas! Just wanted to tell you keep up the fantastic work!

    [Reply]

  • Lila of the Valley July 19, 2014 at 5:42 pm

    Same here! Just discovered it & loving it!

    [Reply]

  • Dane Youssef July 25, 2014 at 3:58 am

    “As you know, I’m not crazy about Jessica…” –TODD

    YOU DON’T NEED TO COMPLETE THE THOUGHT, TODD.

    … OR ANY OTHER FOR THAT MATTER.

    –As Sincere As Ever, Dane Youssef

    [Reply]

  • Dane Youssef July 25, 2014 at 4:01 am

    “As you know, I don’t usually pay much attention to cheerleading, but I did notice that the crowds were more enthusiastic than usual at yesterday’s game.” –LIZ

    GOD, YOU REALLY JUST WANT TO HIT HER WITH A BLUNT INSTRUMENT FOR THIS ONE…

    AND I MEAN HIT HER UNTIL SHE STOPS BREATHING…

    OH HELL, MAYBE LONG AFTER…

    PRETENTIOUS LITTLE TWAT…

    –All The Best Possible, Dane Youssef

    [Reply]

  • KannaChan July 10, 2015 at 7:44 pm

    I can’t like Heather because of how she makes certain members quit and won’t even let them eat fat. If she is co-captain, then how can she do anything without Jessica’s approval as well? I wasn’t aware that a co-captain could just decide to kick someone off the squad without the other’s input.

    [Reply]

  • Dane Youssef October 8, 2015 at 6:52 pm

    “As you know, I don’t usually pay much attention to cheer-leading, but I did notice that the crowds were more enthusiastic than usual at yesterday’s game.” –Liz

    “Shut up, Liz. Something about this quote just irks the hell out of me.” –Shannon

    Understood. She’s just so damn pretentious. Are we supposed to be impress in how observant she is with details like this?

    Seriously, who really is the most hateful and irritating of the Wakefield soeurs?

    –A Slow Burning Agonizing Torturous Death To The Both of Them, Dane Youssef

    [Reply]

  • Kim December 12, 2015 at 6:59 pm

    “Everyone gets quiet when a really pretty girl walks in, orders some food and leaves. As soon as she’s gone, everyone starts talking about how beautiful she was. Jessica hates the girl instantly and hopes she never sees her again.”

    Jessica is such a hater. Don’t hate the player, hate the game. It ain’t Heather’s fault she’s good at everything. Despite all the Heather hate, I like her. Looks like Jessica finally met her match, and I’m here for Jessica finally getting a dose of her own medicine.

    [Reply]

  • fubukifangirl May 24, 2016 at 12:59 pm

    I don’t care much for Heather’s personality but I dislike Jessica’s even more. It’s nice to see Jessica get a taste of how she’s treated others.

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  • Alex Kennedy February 22, 2017 at 8:43 am

    I find the fact that the cheerleaders are left to regulate themselves to be ridiculous. Most squads have some form of member of staff to keep an eye on them, unless you are part of the “Texas Five” – ie some true to life film where the cheerleaders practically ran the school. Why should Heather have the authority to reduce the members of the squad?

    ^^^She WAS snarky to Jess. Unfortunately, Jess is so up herself that she does not realise what a pathetic bully she is.

    [Reply]

  • Sweet Valley Forever April 21, 2017 at 7:54 am

    The TV episode of this was okay. The only problem was that the character of Heather was not sufficiently bitchy. It would have been better if the episode had adhered more to the book ie making all the girls go on diets and become blatantly anorexic.

    [Reply]

  • KannaChan April 21, 2017 at 8:18 am

    Thats the thing, they book never portrayed Heather as anorexic. The girls are always complimenting her on how fit her body is.

    [Reply]

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