Sweet Valley High #109: Double-Crossed

SVH109Read the rest of this miniseries: Part one, part two.

The Moral of the Story: If he’ll cheat with you, he’ll cheat on you.

The Big Deal: Halloween party

Synopsis:

After stopping Jeremy from marrying Sue, Jessica hides out at Lila’s house. The day after the wedding, Jeremy gives Jessica a ring and asks her to marry him. Then he says he has to go to Costa Rica for a month to take care of some business. Jessica is upset, and she gets even more upset when Liz calls her at Lila’s and says Ned and Alice think Jessica has gone too far this time. They’re thinking of sending her to a boarding school in Washington state.

Liz has been spending her time taking care of Sue, who now has tranquilizers to help her cope. Sue tells Liz that Nancy, her very wealthy mother, never liked Jeremy and cut Sue out of her will when Sue refused to quit seeing him. Now Sue’s mother is dead, Sue is penniless and she doesn’t even have Jeremy anymore. Then one day, Alice gets a registered letter. It turns out there was a stipulation in Nancy’s will. Sue was only cut off if she stayed with Jeremy. If she stays away from him for two months, she will get her inheritance. Sue seems totally surprised by this news.

It appears to be the beginning of a school year, which is weird, but whatever. Sweet Valley High is instituting a new math program called Go Math. GO stands for Girls Only. Apparently, studies have shown that girls don’t do as well at math as boys do, so Go Math is an experimental program that segregates the math classes. Liz is outraged by the whole thing, but as the weeks pass, she realizes everyone is actually doing better in math, including her. She writes a series of articles about the program, and of course the Sweet Valley News picks them up. In other Liz news, she doesn’t like Todd’s muck-stache. Todd doesn’t realize his attempt at facial hair is totally lame and pathetic and he seems to think he’s really hot shit. He starts calling Liz “babe,” which she hates, and he twirls his mustache a lot when Liz gets mad at him. They eventually break up over the stupid mustache. Oh, you stupid kids.

After a while, Sue tells the Wakefields that she’s really over Jeremy, so Ned and Alice tell Jessica to come home. Her first night back from Lila’s, Jessica announces at dinner that she and Jeremy are engaged. The next day, Sue overdoses on her tranquilizers and Jessica’s parents set up a meeting with the headmaster of the boarding school. Jessica misses Jeremy and is frustrated that he’s never around when she calls. Lila tries to tell her that maybe Jeremy isn’t that into her, but Jessica refuses to believe that. Then Amy shows her a film she shot on the beach for a school project, and Jessica sees a couple in the video that looks just like Jeremy and Sue. Amy tells her she only shot it two weeks ago, so it can’t be them.

Sue confesses to Liz that she lied about having a “rare blood disease” to keep Jeremy from leaving her. Liz is shocked, but thinks she understands. Then there’s a scene of Sue making a phone call, but we don’t know who she’s calling. She talks about what a “total drag” it was to have her stomach pumped. She makes plans to meet whoever she’s talking to. So now we know there’s something weird going on with Sue.

Jeremy finally comes back to town, but he acts kind of distant and weird. He does tell Jessica that Project Nature, the company he works for, is throwing a big Halloween bash and the whole Sweet Valley High gang is invited. At the party, Liz and Todd finally make up, so don’t worry about them, folks. Jessica can’t find Jeremy anywhere and she starts to think about all kinds of things about him that don’t add up, like the fact that he wouldn’t let her wait while he got on his plane to Costa Rica and the fact that he was never once there when she called him. She wanders outside and finds him making out with Sue. What a jackass. Liz takes Jessica home, and a little while later, Jeremy comes to the door. He’s all freaked out because Sue has “disappeared.”

To be continued. Ugh, won’t this Jeremy/Sue story arc ever end?

Quotes:

In a sense she felt as if Jessica was willing to leave Elizabeth forever to be with Jeremy. It was one thing to stay at Lila’s until a scandal blew over – it was another to commit yourself to a man and be ready to run off with him. Leaving Elizabeth behind. As though they were just regular sisters. Not twins at all.

Liz, what do you think is going to happen when you guys actually do get married? Are you going to share a bathroom for the rest of your lives?

“You’re our daughter and we love you. We’ll always love you no matter what. But we’re very worried about you. We’re worried about the decisions you’ve been making lately. The whole thing with Jeremy and Sue – it doesn’t seem like you.”

The fact that Alice is surprised by the “thing with Jeremy and Sue” just goes to show how much she pays attention to her kids.

“So now it all comes out. You hate my mustache, you hate my haircut, you hate what I call you…Kids at school think my mustache is hot, this is a totally radical haircut, and maybe I just won’t call you anything from now on. As in, I won’t be calling you at all!”

Oh, Todd. This is a totally radical breakup speech.

The Cover: As you can see, Jeremy and Jessica are Aladdin and Jasmine for Halloween. Sue and Jeremy look like they’re having some trouble; Sue looks mad because their hats keep crashing and they can’t kiss properly.

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Comments
  • Sandy September 28, 2009 at 1:29 pm

    Okay, it’s getting better.
    Kudos to Todd for growing his mustache (sp?) and I bet he also got his pubes.
    Sue is just as psycho as Jess. What is with this I NEED a man to love me syndrome??? The lesson here kiddos is that if he leaves you, then you fake terminal illness or a pregnancy!!!

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  • Shannon September 28, 2009 at 2:21 pm

    Sandy, lol@Todd’s pubes.
    You’re so right about today’s lesson. The only way to keep a man is to guilt him into staying with you.

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  • Keri September 28, 2009 at 4:21 pm

    Todd is like the opposite of totally radical…someone totally radical would have used a sweet line involving a mustache ride to get his girlfriend to dig on it.

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  • Lori September 28, 2009 at 5:24 pm

    Jeremy sounds like a real catch who doesn’t want to be with a man who cheats on every girl he’s with.

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  • LadyJ3000 September 28, 2009 at 6:28 pm

    They sound like a perfect couple. He’ll cheat on her and she’ll cheat on him. A match made in Heaven.

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  • HelenB September 28, 2009 at 7:55 pm

    I think there are still another two books to go? I kind of love this arc, all the way to its ridiculously improbable conclusion!

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  • Shannon September 28, 2009 at 8:19 pm

    Keri, you are so right. Todd’s NOT totally radical. He’s really just a douche.

    Lori, I know I can’t help but fall in love with men who cheat on their fiances.

    LadyJ, welcome! Sounds good to me. A couple of cheaters cheatin’.

    Helen, you really liked this one? I could have done without it. Honestly, most of the miniseries are too long for me by at least a book. By midway through the second one, I’m usually ready to move on.

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  • HelenB September 28, 2009 at 9:11 pm

    To be honest, I’m pretty sure I only like it because I’ve only read about two books from it! If I had to read all of them I’d probably despise it too.

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  • Lindsay September 29, 2009 at 1:14 pm

    Don’t send her ass to my state, Ned and Alice. What have the Washingtonians ever done to you? Now, it’s cool to send Lila cause we’ll be BFF’s and she can just be all around awesome here.

    Todd twirls his mustache? Seriously? Does he wear it like this?
    http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/rudy4.jpg

    My answer? Yes. Or,maybe even like this: http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_nEsQnzB7Q2Q/R8s8pEXHPUI/AAAAAAAAAsM/dzOQY-iY2P0/s400/Justin%2BTimberlake%2Bplays%2Ba%2B70%E2%80%99s%2Bporn%2Bstar.jpg. Actually, now that I’ve seen that pic, I’m convinced that’s what Todd looks like with his facial hair. All douchey and 70’s porn star-ish.

    Totally radical?! For reals?!

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  • Shannon September 29, 2009 at 3:01 pm

    Lindsay, now I’m totally convinced it was a porn mustache.
    Maybe Jessica can convince George Fowler to let Lila come along with her to boarding school. Then you and Lila could plot Jessica’s overthrow.

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  • DarfurHerald September 29, 2009 at 6:52 pm

    Jess has been in how many “affairs” and she STILL can’t believe she was tricked by Jeremy? And that Sue and Jeremy are together, “cheating”? Come on! Also, Ned and Alice telling Jessica to come home when Sue says she’s over Jeremy? Um, what? So Jess was only sent away when Sue was confused about Jeremy? Jessica’s manwhoring and engagement-breaking-up didn’t matter?

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  • Tracy London September 29, 2009 at 9:43 pm

    “Todd is like the opposite of totally radical…someone totally radical would have used a sweet line involving a mustache ride to get his girlfriend to dig on it.”

    I am laughing so hard at this comment right now. I can see it. Liz would clutch her pearls and cry.

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  • Shannon September 29, 2009 at 9:45 pm

    DH, I agree with everything you said. This whole miniseries is just a mess of WTF? moments.

    Tracy, lol.

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  • Amanda September 30, 2009 at 2:13 pm

    Yessssss Lila HAS to move here! And I agree with Lindsay we did nothing to diserve Jess!

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    Shannon Reply:

    Ha! You poor Washingtonians.

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    DarfurHerald Reply:

    The Washingtonians had/have Jess AND Bella Swan *shudder*

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    Shannon Reply:

    Is that the Twilight girl? I’d be super pissed about that.

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  • Kylie90210 May 7, 2013 at 7:44 pm

    The best thing about this mini-series? Todds mustache. And Ken. For sure.

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  • Dane Youssef March 28, 2016 at 11:43 pm

    Hey, Shannon… Darling, SERIOUSLY–

    I notice a lot of my comments (witty and compelling as they are), do desperately suffer from a severe crippling case of typos. So, so, so, SO many misprints…

    Please… install a personal edit button on this damn thing, for everyone’s personal comment account so we can correct our own mistakes. Next to LINK, QUOTE and REPLY… there should be an EDIT. Oh, not to mention a DELETE, by the by. For those little editorials that desperately need to completely edited out of existence itself…

    Please, I implore you… A blog doesn’t have the luxury of erasers, white-out or “TAKE TWO!” Let me fix what needs to be fixed…

    –All The Best Humanly Possible, DANE YOUSSEF

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  • Dane Youssef March 28, 2016 at 11:51 pm

    “In a sense she felt as if Jessica was willing to leave Elizabeth forever to be with Jeremy. It was one thing to stay at Lila’s until a scandal blew over – it was another to commit yourself to a man and be ready to run off with him. Leaving Elizabeth behind. As though they were just regular sisters. Not twins at all.”

    Oh, cut the cord already. Or wait… I mean, separate the fetus.

    Jesus, Alice Wakefield should’ve aborted her second pregnancy.

    Heh. Probably the first one, too…

    TODD: “So now it all comes out. You hate my mustache, you hate my haircut, you hate what I call you…Kids at school think my mustache is hot, this is a totally radical haircut, and maybe I just won’t call you anything from now on. As in, I won’t be calling you at all!”

    Wow, what a dramatic monologue. Or at least one compelling and necessary paragraph. Come on, we’ve all been wanting him to say this one for a while. Since Day One. Well… not the “DOUBLE LOVE” series premiere… more like the first damn time Elizabeth cheated and he went to HER to beg forgiveness… You thoughtless robotic eunuch puppet-doormat. Todd deserves worse than death by a thousand cuts. Worse than death by fire. Worse than being drawn and quartered. Worse than being water-boarded in acid. Worse that dumped in a pit of leeches ’til they all suck him dry…

    He deserves…. Elizabeth Wakefield.

    May they die in each others arms. While on fire…

    –Sincere As Always, DANE YOUSSEF

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  • Kristina Rodriguez December 13, 2016 at 6:54 pm

    I’m so glad that Jeremy cheated on Jessica with Sue. She deserved it. As the moral says “If he’ll cheat with you, he’ll cheat on you.”

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