Sweet Valley High 1×03: Skin and Bones
Enid: Hi, Dakota! Hi! You’re so artistic!
Lila: I can’t believe Dakota is using Enid as a model for his painting.
Jessica: Not for long.
Winston: You guys are so cute, I just have to put you on the graffiti wall!
Bruce: Mr. Cooper, this is a really great picture of you on the graffiti wall. Ha ha, I’m so cool.
Mr. Cooper: I’m confiscating this!
Liz: That’s censorship! I won’t stand for it! Gather around me, fellow students, while I crusade for free speech and the right to humiliate authority figures!
Dakota: I’m deep and artistic. You can tell by my long hair.
Dakota: Oh, yeah, hey. Would you mind washing these brushes?
Enid: Wow, that looks great! I’m so lucky to be your model!
Enid: What are you doing here?
Jessica: I’m Dakota’s new assistant!
I wonder if there’s anything in this book about what to do when you look twelve and all your friends look twenty.
Jessica: I have something totally important to tell you about Dakota!
Enid: Yeah, right. You’ve never been nice to me.
Jessica: Fine, I’ll just leave and you’ll never know…
Enid: Jessica, wait! Your clever ruse was too much! I have to know what you wanted to tell me!
Jessica: Oh, nothing. Just that Dakota plans to paint you in the nude.
Jessica: Don’t be such a baby, Enid. I’ll take care of telling him you don’t want to do it.
Enid: Gee, thanks. You’re so helpful and I don’t suspect anything strange is going on.
Todd: Here comes Mr. Cooper. He looks pretty mad about that article you wrote about censorship.
Mr. Cooper: I’m pretty mad about that article you wrote about censorship.
Liz: I’m sorry, Mr. Cooper, but you gave us that graffiti wall. You have no right to tell us what to put on it.
Mr. Cooper: Come on now, does that make sense to you?
Hello, Dakota. I’m here in my awesome picnic outfit. Enid can’t make it…
…so I’ll be your model.
Dakota: *sigh* I guess you’ll do.
Jessica: Liz, why are you at the mall with us popular girls? I can’t talk about how I scammed Enid when you’re here.
Liz: You did what?
Jessica: Oh, yeah. I totally did.
Lila and No-Name: Jessica is so awesome. I want to be her.
Jessica: So, Lila. How jealous are you that I’m about to be famous?
Lila: Whatever, it’s just a high school art show.
Mr. Cooper: Okay, kids. This is a super important painting done by our super important painter. And here it is!
Jessica: Oh my god.
Liz and No-Name: I don’t believe it!
Dakota: Ha, she’s totally naked.
Lila and No-Name: Enid, why are you sitting with us?
Enid: Because you hate Jessica now, right?
Jessica: Why is everyone staring at me? Haven’t you ever seen a naked girl before?
Boys: No, no we haven’t.
Liz: It’s too bad Jessica can’t be as wholesome as me.
Todd: *daydreaming* What? Oh, right. Wholesome. It’s the best.
Jessica: Liz, I didn’t pose naked for him! Don’t you believe me?
Liz: Not even a little bit, but I’ll help you.
Liz: Was my sister naked?
Dakota: No, but I totally pictured her naked, so that’s what I painted.
Liz: Huh, she was actually telling the truth. Good thing I’m recording this conversation.
Liz: Listen, guys, Jessica is innocent!
Lila: But what are we going to do about Dakota?
Jessica: I have a plan.
Hey, Dakota. Would you like to have a picnic with me?
Dakota: This sure is nice. I don’t suspect a thing.
Jessica: Let’s go skinny-dipping!
Hold on, I have some towels in the Jeep. Be right back!
This is going to be so awesome.
Ha! You’re naked and we’re taking pictures!
Dude, this totally sucks.
Winston: I really wish you hadn’t made Dakota paint a swimsuit on you.
Todd: Dude, me too.
Mr. Cooper: Elizabeth, I just want to apologize to you. You were right. It’s totally okay to undermine authority and make the school faculty look like idiots. Here, take this picture and put it back on the graffiti wall.
Liz: I knew you’d see things my way eventually.
Dakota: I painted your swimsuit on, so give me the film.
We’re so awesome. Hooray!