Sweet Valley High #11: Too Good to be True

The moral of the story: If you send your kids to boarding school, they’ll grow up to be the devil.

The Big Deal: Party at Lila’s and another at the lake

Best outfit: Liz – her favorite velvet skirt and a high-necked lace Victorian blouse

Synopsis: Suzanne Devlin is the daughter of a friend of Ned’s who lives in New York. She’s coming to Sweet Valley over spring break and the Wakefields will send one twin to New York in her place. Elizabeth wins the coin toss, but Jessica talks her out of going by making her think Todd will cheat on her while she’s gone.

Suzanne arrives and dazzles everyone with her beauty and charm. She’s so gorgeous she even makes Liz self-conscious about her own “lovely size six figure.” Liz takes her to the school picnic at the lake and the boys all fall in love with her. Then Suzanne pretends to be drowning so Mr. Collins, he of the crinkly blue eyes, can save her.

A few days later, Suzanne steals Liz’s necklace. Then she offers to drop something off with Mr. Collins and flirts with him unsuccessfully while she’s there. Then Todd shows up with Lakers tickets and Suzanne offers to take over Liz’s job babysitting for Teddy that night so Liz can go to the game.

Now, if I’m Mr. Collins and this slutty high school chick I already don’t trust shows up unexpectedly to watch my kid, I’m staying home. But, “it’ll have to do.” As soon as he’s gone, Suzanne ignores the kid, goes through Mr. Collins’s stuff and takes a bath in his tub. Creepy. When he comes home she tries to seduce him, but he rejects her. Burn! She storms out in a huff and walks home, purposely ripping her shirt on the way. When she gets back to the Wakefields’ house she tells Liz that Mr. Collins attacked her. And Liz believes her. It’s the scandal of the century.

Then, just before Todd picks her up for the big party at Lila’s house, Liz finds her necklace in Suzanne’s suitcase. Now, you mustn’t think she was snooping! Elizabeth Wakefield would never, ever do something like that. She was just trying to make some room for the gift she’d bought for Suzanne. Ugh. Confused about the necklace and worried Suzanne might have lied about other things, Liz has Todd swing by Mr. Collins’ house on the way to the party. She finds out Suzanne lied and vows that she won’t get away with it.

At the party, she confronts Suzanne, who confesses to everything. Before Elizabeth can do anything about it, Suzanne starts telling everyone Liz is acting weird, like that time after the motorcycle accident. Well played, Suzy. Ruin her credibility before she even has a chance, you devious minx. Enid comes to Liz in tears and tells her what everyone is saying, so Liz marches up to Suzanne, right there in front of everyone, and tells her to stop spreading lies. Winston, who had heard Suzanne’s confession earlier, spills a well-timed drink on the evil bitch’s white dress. Suzy loses her cool and turns into a monster, screaming and crying. I picture everyone backing away from her with horrified expressions on their faces. So Mr. Collins gets his job back and everything is terrific again.

Oh, and in New York, Jessica almost gets raped by Suzanne’s boyfriend. No big deal.

Quotes:

“Ned, didn’t you say she’s gone to boarding schools most of her life?” She sighed. “I suppose there’s nothing wrong with it, but I don’t see how I ever could have sent you kids away like that. Maybe I’m just old-fashioned, but I think children belong at home until they’re ready for college.”

Thanks, Alice. I will sure take that into consideration, considering how well your kids turned out. I mean, you have Goofus and Gallant for daughters and a son who comes home from college every weekend to hang out with high school kids. You’ve done an amazing job.

Steven: “If you turned sideways and stuck your tongue out, you could probably pass for a zipper.”

Liz: “Don’t I wish!”

Ugh.

Jessica and the number 137

“I’ll probably never set foot out of this dumb town for the next hundred and thirty-seven years!” p. 6

“The Devlins – well, it would take me a hundred and thirty-seven years to describe them.” p. 69

The Cover: Doesn’t Suzanne just look like a snobby bitch? I kind of just want to punch her in the throat. She reminds me of someone, but I can’t put my finger on it. And I love the snarky look on Liz’s face. Oh, and can Liz please, please do something else with her hair? The whole pulled-back-with-barrettes thing is so old.

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Comments
  • Whitney G March 24, 2009 at 4:49 pm

    “If you turned sideways and stuck your tongue out, you could probably pass for a zipper.”

    I…don’t really get this. Is he saying Elizabeth is skinny? Silver? Has hundreds of teeth? Belongs on the crotch of his pants? WTF, Steven?

    [Reply]

    Anonymous Reply:

    It means she is really skinny because Liz said something about Steven’s bod being puny. So he used the zipper thing to retaliate.

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    Shannon Reply:

    I think Whitney was joking.

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    Cara Walker Reply:

    From what I know of this family inner workings- Steven meant the crotch of his pants!

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  • nugirl77 May 5, 2009 at 9:32 am

    I’m disappointed Liz could so easily believe Suzanne’s lie about her favorite teacher, adviser, counselor and friend. Hasn’t Mr Collins shown Liz more faith in her writing ability to warrant more trust, more understanding? 🙂

    And the name “Suzanne” must be synonymous with “bad” and “troublemaker.” There’s this Suzanne and then there’s Suzanne Hanlon from book #27 Lovestruck.

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  • girltalkread June 9, 2009 at 8:40 am

    OMG what you said about Alice Wakefield is HYSTERICAL- Goofus and Gallant HAH HAH HAH!! Yeah seriously I don’t see where keeping her kiddies home served them so well- Steven is like always at home now!
    Personally if I ever have a kid I am sending her ass to boarding school at Miss Porters- the teen years suck anyway! 😉

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  • Amya July 13, 2009 at 12:51 pm

    So Liz just calls Suzeanne on her bullshit, but won’t say anything to her perfect, petite twin? WTF?

    [Reply]

    caligirl76 Reply:

    I know! lol

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  • Karla January 12, 2010 at 1:25 am

    Liz’s outfit sounds kind of cool. I’d wear it with Docs, though.

    [Reply]

    Shannon Reply:

    Yeah, that’s about the only way I’d ever wear it. Liz isn’t cool enough for Docs, though.

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    Karla Reply:

    Lynne Henry and Lois Waller are the only two SVHers who are Doc-worthy, in my arrogantly humble opinion. 🙂

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    Shannon Reply:

    You’re absolutely right. Maybe Betsy Martin, but she’s cool, she goes to art school.

    [Reply]

    Karla Reply:

    True, and she dropped out. Molly Hecht might wear Docs.

    It’s just so unfair that these SVH bints have the money to buy all these cute steampunk clothes but have absolutely no idea how to work them! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must go stuff my face with the candy bars I keep in my purse at all times.

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    dirtywingsgirl Reply:

    Maybe Dana would wear Doc’s…although she might be more of a Chuck Taylors gal I suppose. One who would actually wear one of those pre-ripped store-bought shirts with “Punk” written on them.

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  • dirtywingsgirl January 30, 2010 at 9:33 pm

    “She reminds me of someone, but I can’t put my finger on it. ”

    She sort of looks like Angelica Houston to me.

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  • Kylie90210 July 19, 2010 at 1:14 am

    Oh Liz. Always willing to believe the best of everyone. Doesn’t Suzanne come back in a super edition?

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  • Anonymous October 4, 2010 at 8:03 am

    “She reminds me of someone, but I can’t put my finger on it.”
    Bella Swan (Kristan Stewart) in the Twi(fail)light movies.

    Acts the same too.

    [Reply]

  • Angela2BPecked May 29, 2011 at 2:11 pm

    Suzanne kind of looks like Debi Mazar!

    [Reply]

    Cara Walker Reply:

    She does!

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  • Kanna-Chan February 4, 2013 at 4:40 am

    That nose makes Liz look like a skinny, blonde monkey.

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  • katie March 1, 2013 at 6:12 pm

    Suzanne reminds me of Courtney from Ben’s season of The Bachelor…personality and looks. And I love your comment about Alice, baaah ha! But I do love The Wakefields….

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  • JBlaze October 26, 2013 at 5:07 am

    “Winston, who had heard Suzanne’s confession earlier, spills a well-timed drink on the evil bitch’s white dress. Suzy loses her cool and turns into a monster, screaming and crying”

    Reminds me of the scene in The Little Mermaid where the sea witch nearly marries prince Eric, but is unmasked at the last minute! 😀

    [Reply]

  • Gia January 8, 2014 at 6:46 pm

    Suzanne and Todd date after he moves to Vermont. She goes home and suddenly has one of those Sweet Valley Disorder Personality Changes and becomes like Elizabeth.

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  • Nikki July 7, 2014 at 11:15 pm

    “As soon as he’s gone, Suzanne ignores the kid, goes through Mr. Collins’s stuff and takes a bath in his tub.”

    Weird. She didn’t take a bath before she went over there to babysit? I can’t believe how ridiculous these stories were.

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  • Anonymous July 11, 2014 at 12:22 pm

    Pretty sure the little trollop’s hope was for Mr. Collins to come home and find her in the tub…. =)

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  • Alex Kennedy July 9, 2016 at 5:03 am

    Jess is quite the manipulator when she convinces Liz that she should remain in Sweet Valley. We all saw that one coming didn’t we? As a consequence of the fact that the new visitor is beautiful, everyone loves her. Even Liz is conscious about her size six figure. Perhaps you should walk Prince Albert a few more times around the block if you are that worried, Lis.

    Suzanne emulates Jessica when she accuses a man of molesting her because he pushed her away. Why is it that in the serious no one is investigated for lying about such a serious matter?

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  • Jessica W is an a Bad Person August 4, 2017 at 7:59 am

    I just love the way these SV people always think the worse of one another. Mc C has always been a good teacher and yet most people believe the bad things people at about him. I think it was Cara who said something along the lines “He gave me a C last year” – how is that relevant. When Jessica gets into trouble in book 1 everyone believes it is Liz. When Liz SPOILER ALERT “gets drunk” in the later books, no one stops to think that Liz’s drink might have been spiked. Yet, when John Pfeiffer tries to rape Lila, it is Lila’s credibility which is questioned. Usually Lila is so mean, but I kind of felt sorry for her character.

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